I accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior in 2014 and was Baptized in 2015. Both events were unexpected and God lead. I grew up always wondering who God was and what Christianity meant but had little opportunity to learn. I found God on a Friday morning in a room full of moms just like me and then learned all about Jesus one on one with a stranger who told me of His love and how He didn’t care about anything that had ever happened in my life, the bad choices I had made, the lies I had told, the drugs I had used, the gossip I enjoyed. None of that mattered. I was loved regardless of all my flaws and forgiven for every single one of them. From that moment on I was curious. At that time we had been attending a church that was very set in tradition and offered little to no assistance for questions. I wanted to learn more about this Jesus guy but I was left looking for Him on my own. I had a very small handful of wonderful mentors who helped direct me in the right place, but they didn’t know that God had already been talking to me and we had a relationship before I even knew what it was. The Holy Spirit was growing in me at a rate I was unprepared to understand and couldn’t explain to others.
I had tried reaching out to women within my circle, my age, moms like me who I thought would understand. They told me they loved God. They attended church every Sunday but outside of showing up at each weekend service, I didn’t see much evidence that they reflected their lives the way God had asked them to. I was confused. It wasn’t like there was a set of rules or manual for new believers because that is not what a true relationship with Christ is about, but I wanted more and kept hitting brick walls.
It wasn’t until I was asked by an acquaintance to meet at a new church we had been attending, that I was asked to start a prayer group. She had told me that God had put my name on her heart and that she thought I was the one to bring this group into our community. Although I was flattered and loved the idea, I still didn’t know what I was doing and I was trying to understand my own faith journey the best I could. How could I support others when I couldn’t explain what I was going through. I told her that now was not the time for me but that I would keep the information with me in case the opportunity became a good fit for me in the future. In our talk, she opened up to me about a prayer group that she was apart of. Suggesting that perhaps starting a smaller group, much like hers might be a good starting point. Her group consisted of about 8 women who met once a month and prayed and talked in prayer for 3 hours. I was intrigued and thought it would be a great idea but I had one problem. I didn’t know anyone I could start my group with because it is hard to find women who want to dig deeper in faith. Many are happy and comfortable where they are at. I always want more. I scare people away when I bring up the F or J word. I boldly, not expecting a yes, asked if she would be open to me attending her group meeting just so I could get an idea of what they did. She did not give me an immediate yes but text me later that day inviting me to their next meeting. I was thrilled! This was a group of women who I looked up to and knew it was where I would find growth like I had been seeking.
Fast forward to today, there are a TON of little side notes and bunny trails I could add but I started this blog, godshapedmom.com because God told me to and because I wanted to offer a resource for women and moms who wanted to dig deeper but didn’t know how or where. It is easy to read a quick blip online but to learn practical ways to hear God speak, to develop a deeper relationship and to fall so in love with Jesus Christ that you can’t help but get excited every time you hear His name, I want you to find that here.
Don’t feel ashamed for wanting to live out your calling. Don’t question the plan He has for you. ‘Be still, and know that I am God’ Psalm 46:10 NLT. In the Practical Application tab at the top of this blog, you’ll find ways to listen and grow deeper by doing what God. He has some exciting things he wants to say to you, I just know it!